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Give it a Lewinsky

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In his latest column, the editor of the New Jersey Jewish News assumes the persona of Dr. Sam Difference, America’s leading expert in parsing the fine distinctions between seemingly identical phenomena. On the scale of McGreevey to Abramoff, he gives the Spitzer scandal a Lewinsky:

Q: We thought you might point out that Spitzer is Jewish and McGreevey is Catholic.

A: So what’s your question: Who feels guiltier? Or do you want to know who has the higher shanda fer de goyim factor? Years ago measuring the humiliation that nogoodniks bring upon the Jews was an amateur affair, but advances in social science allow us to calculate shame in what are known as Abramoff units. Considering Spitzer is Jewish, that he may have broken a law or two, and that the alleged operator of the Emperors VIP Club has an Israel connection, you might think Spitzer has a higher Abramoff score. But wait: McGreevey actually met the man he describes as his lover on a UJA mission in Israel. Both governors were involved in interfaith relationships, so that’s no help either. So let’s call it a tie: 6.3 Abramoffs each, give or take a Milken.

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