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Everything you wanted to know about your 13-year-old’s sex life but were afraid to ask

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JVibe, the magazine for Jewish teenagers, is conducting a survey on the sex lives of teenagers aged 13-19 for a summer issue devoted to love and sex.

The magazine, published by Jewish Family and Life, wants to survey at least 500 teens to find out what they think about sex – and what they have done in the bedroom – in an attempt to find out what many parents may not want to know.

“These are the same parents who think their kids shouldn’t be getting sex ed at school. In order to inform this summer’s Love/Sex issue, we wanted to find out what Jewish teens are actually thinking and doing when it comes to dating and hooking up,” the magazine’s editor, Lindsey Silken, told the Fundermentalist. “How can we address our audience appropriately if we don’t know what’s going on in their heads? And is our audience different from the typical American teen? It was time for us to find out.”

The survey isn’t shy about asking for some pretty intimate details.

Among them:

  • What is your experience with sending suggestive or nude photos or videos via your cell phone (also known as "sexting")?
  • How much of the time do you and your partner use a condom?
  • Have you ever given oral sex to someone of the opposite sex?
  • Have you ever given or received oral sex from someone of the same sex?
     

So far, close to 400 kids have taken the survey, most of them between the ages of 15 and 19. Among them, 68 percent have said that they have not yet had sex.

“We plan to share the results in a few ways. Some of the statistics will be reported in our summer issue (and will inform the features which are teen-written and handle hooking up and virginity), some will be on our website, and we may feed a few of the results out through our monthly eletter to promote new subscribers for the summer issue. We figure there will be others in the community who are interested in what comes out of this, so we may share some of the statistics with other interested parties,” she said. “We feel a responsibility to answer those questions.”

The JVibe staff knows it was sensitive asking kids as young as 13 about their sex lives, but felt it important to do so anyway.

“We also realize many of these questions don’t apply to 13-year-olds. That’s why we have the option not to answer questions with which teens are not comfortable,” Silken said. “I think any 13-year-old who is not thinking about hooking up isn’t going to take the survey anyway, and those who are should be factored into the results. If those teens’ parents think they aren’t thinking about these things, they may be in blissful denial.”

Here’s the whole survey:

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JVibe Teen Love/Sex Survey 2009

Welcome to JVibe’s first-ever Teen Love/Sex Survey! We want to know how YOU feel about dating, hooking up and falling in love. If you’re not yet a JVibe subscriber, sign up now at JVibe.com and get our summer Love/Sex issue.

One lucky survey respondent will win a $200 gift card to Amazon.com. Please note that the JVibe Teen Love/Sex Survey 2009 is only intended for 13- to 19-year-olds. All responses will remain completely anonymous. The survey is intended for research purposes only. Only aggregate results–not individual data–will be shared in a future issue of JVibe or on JVibe.com. All participants may enter to win a $200 Amazon.com gift card. The winner will be notified by email. To find out the results of this survey, sign up for our monthly e-letter.

We collect personal information from minors on a voluntary basis. We do not knowingly collect personal information from children under the age of 13. Children under 13 are not eligible to take part as survey participants and we ask that minors (under the age of 13) do not submit any personal information to us. If you are a minor, you can only view our public website. Should we discover that we have personal information regarding any child under the age of 13, we will delete that information from our systems.

For our complete Privacy Policy, please visit jvibe.com/privacy.

You must be at least 13 years old to take this survey. Are you 13 years of age or older?
Yes
No (skip to closing page)

How old are you?
13
14
15
16
17
18
19

You are:
Male
Female

What is your ZIP code?

What is your religious affiliation?
Reform
Conservative
Modern Orthodox
Orthodox
Reconstructionist
Secular
Atheist
Agnostic
Chasidic
Not affiliated
Not Jewish
Other

Does your religion influence your decision about whether or not to have sex?
Yes, a lot
A little bit
No
Other

What is your sexual orientation?
Heterosexual
Homosexual
Bisexual
Transsexual
Not sure
Other

Please tell us about your general dating habits.

Have you ever been on a date?
Yes
No

Do you prefer to hang out in mixed-gender groups rather than go on one-on-one dates?
I prefer mixed-gender groups
I prefer one-on-one dates
It depends on the situation
Not sure

Have you ever had a serious boyfriend or girlfriend?
Yes
No

Have you ever been in love?
Yes
No

What do you consider to mean "hooking up"? Please check all that apply.
Kissing
Hand to genital contact
Oral sex
Sexual intercourse
Other

Now we are going to ask you about hooking up.

Have you ever kissed someone on the lips romantically?
Yes
No

Why do you engage in sexual activities, including kissing? Please check all that apply.
I like the way it feels to be intimate with someone.
I feel like my partner expects it.
I feel pressure by my friends and/or peers.
It is what everyone else is doing.
I am in love with my partner and enjoy being intimate with him or her.
It makes me more popular.
It makes me feel cool.
So I can talk about it with my friends.
I do not engage in any sexual activities, including kissing.
Other

What is your experience with sending suggestive or nude photos or videos via your cell phone (also known as "sexting")? Please check all that apply.
I have sent suggestive or nude photos or videos of myself to someone else.
I have received suggestive or nude photos or videos from someone else.
I have never sent or received suggestive or nude photos or videos.
I have been pressured to send suggestive or nude photos or videos of myself.
Someone else has sent suggestive or nude photos or videos of me.

Who was the last person you hooked up with?
My boyfriend or girlfriend
My friend
Someone I occasionally hook up with but with whom I am not in a relationship
Someone random–it was a one-time thing
Someone with whom I want to be in an exclusive relationship
I have never hooked up with anyone
Other

Do your parents currently talk to you about sex, or have they in the past?
Yes
No

Where do you get the majority of your sex information from? Please select two choices.
Parents
Siblings
Close friends
Peers
School health teacher or guidance counselor
Television
The Internet
Magazines
My synagogue
Other

This portion of the survey asks explicit questions about your past and current sexual activity. You may select "I prefer not to answer" for any question and still move ahead in the survey. If at any time you feel uncomfortable, you may exit the survey.

What do you consider to be more risky?
Oral sex
Vaginal intercourse
Not sure
I prefer not to answer

Have you ever had vaginal intercourse?
Yes
No (skip to oral sex)
I prefer not to answer

How old were you when you first had sexual intercourse?
13 or younger
14
15
16
17
18
19
I prefer not to answer

Were you comfortable with your decision to have sex?
Yes
No
Somewhat
Beforehand I was, but afterward I was not and felt I should have waited.
I prefer not to answer

Have you ever had unprotected sexual intercourse, meaning you did not use a condom?
Yes
No
I prefer not to answer

Are you currently sexually active?
Yes
No (skip to oral sex)
I prefer not to answer

How much of the time do you and your partner use a condom?
Always
Most of the time
Some of the time
Never
I prefer not to answer

How much of the time do you or your partner use a female contraceptive, such as the Pill?
Always
Most of the time
Some of the time
Never
I prefer not to answer

Have you ever given oral sex to someone of the opposite sex?
Yes
No
I prefer not to answer

Have you ever received oral sex from someone of the opposite sex?
Yes
No
I prefer not to answer

Have you ever given or received oral sex from someone of the same sex?
Yes
No
I prefer not to answer

How do you view oral sex?
No big deal–like kissing
Intimate, but casual
A big step
As big a deal as intercourse
Not sure
I prefer not to answer
Other

Have you ever had oral sex or sexual intercourse while under the influence of drugs or alcohol?
Yes
No
Maybe, but I do not remember the details.
I prefer not to answer

Have you ever been tested for sexually transmitted diseases?
Yes
No
I prefer not to answer

Optional: What is your biggest unanswered question about sex?

If you would like to be entered to win a $200 Amazon.com gift card, please enter your email address. By entering your email address, you are confirming that you are 13 years of age or older. The winner will be contacted by email. (Please note that we will not share your personal information.)

If you entered your email address above and would also like to receive JVibe’s FREE monthly e-letter, please opt in below. We will inform subscribers of survey findings in an upcoming e-letter. (Please note that we will not share your personal information.)
Yes, please sign me up.
No, I will pass.

Thank you for taking the JVibe Teen Love/Sex Survey 2009! Please direct any questions or comments to editor@jvibe.com.

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