Flu Sweeps Jerusalem

Despite the Health Ministry’s insistent denials, an epidemic of influenza seems to be sweeping the nation’s capital. Thousands are bed-ridden, running high fevers and suffering the torments of aching limbs and heavy heads. Government offices and private firms are all feeling the pinch as the highly communicable disease rages through departments. Health officials deny the “epidemic,” but local doctors are unanimous in their assessment that there is indeed a bug on the loose in the capital. Said one overworked medic: “If this isn’t a flue epidemic, I don’t know what is I’ve been making house calls since early morning and I won’t be through till late tonight.”