Jill Zarin’s Housewives departure statement

The fired “housewife” who found out earlier this week that she won’t be appearing in the new season of The Real Housewives of New York City, has just released a statement to fans, explaining her departure from the show and her future plans.

Dear Friends and Family,

I’ve had four amazing years on The Real Housewives of New York City. I’m grateful for the experiences and friendships I’ve made on the show. I’ve certainly learned a lot about myself and others. The show has decided to take a different direction and unfortunately I will not be a part of Season five. I have received literally thousands of tweets, emails and Facebook comments from fans all over the world, from Australia to Alaska, and that has meant the world to me. More than you could ever know.

For all the people who have supported me and wished me well, you can see me on a new show that will be announced soon. I will also be making personal appearances around the country promoting my new line of shapewear and leggings called SKWEEZ COUTURE. For more information continue to visit jillzarin.com and follow me on Facebook and Twitter.

As my husband Bobby always tells me “When one door closes, many will open.”

Love and Kisses

Jill

XOXO

 

Let’s briefly parse this letter, shall we?

First, I cannot stand grown women (or men) who sign anything “XOXO” Does Zarin also wear a half-heart necklace while her best friend wears the other half?

Second, SKWEEZ COUTURE? Leggings, no matter how hard Lindsay Lohan tries or how adorably you misspell “squeeze”, will never be high fashion. And the French called and they want their word back since they never intended it to be used in such a way. Usually, I’m not inclined to agree with the French on anything (except wine and cheese) but I’m going to have to go with them this time.