Bill Lawrence defends Zach Braff
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Bill Lawrence defends Zach Braff

Photo by David Shankbone.

A war of snark is heating up over at New York Magazine. Last week, Scott Brown wrote a pretty nasty review of Zach Braff’s new play, “All New People,” focusing more on hating Braff than on the merits of his new work. (Note to Brown: baseless Braff hatred was so 2004.)

Well, Bill Lawrence, creator of “Scrubs” and Braff’s old boss, has come to the rescue of his former protege.

Acknowledging that he was unable to be objective about the work of his close friend, Lawrence chose instead to review the review:

Scott Brown’s latest work opens with an Ally McBeal reference, a joke that hasn’t been fresh for a solid twenty years. It then descends into a kind of silent dog whistle that only pretentious tool bags can hear: “hubristically deliberate bid … for the Exhausted Aughts … emo simulacrum of actual feeling.” Scott, do you wear a monocle?

To which Scott Brown responded:

I do, in fact, wear a monocle. Not by choice.

At 6, I contracted a rare eye disease that left me half-blind and hideous. The monocle helps correct my eyesight — but, unfortunately, not my revolting deformity. Also, I’m told I give off a Lovecraftian fetor that makes women swoon, and not in the I-am-now-having-an-orgasm way.

While his response does make it seem like Brown possesses a sense of humor, read both letters in their entirety over at Vulture to judge who is funnier. Personally, I think the advantage goes to Lawrence, who signed his letter with my new favorite word, “bumptiously.”